•12:40 PM
By: Tom Smith, Wooddale Church of Christ
I have always been a firm believer of talking straight, plain, and not holding back.
The majority of conflict I see in marriages and other relationships, is caused by a lack of communication. For some reason, many people are reluctant to have the "difficult conversation". The problem is, the longer you put off having that conversation, the more difficult it becomes.
I have watched lives ruined simply because people would not communicate with each other.
Listen, this is not a test run.
God has given us this precious thing called life.
We get one shot.
It is too short, too precious to be wasted by not sharing the things that bother us, especially with those we love the most.
It is incredible how people tend to get into a pattern in their life. One day they wake up, and they realize things aren't right. They just aren't the way they should be. But rather than sit down with your spouse, your children, your parents, you simply suppress how you feel and stay quiet.
Days turn into weeks.
Weeks turn into months.
Months then turn into years.
The next thing you know, you have grown "apart" from the ones you were closest to.
Many people live in the same house with other people, but are like strangers.
We communicate on a daily basis as little as possible, and never, NEVER about unpleasant things.
Husbands and wives get involved in things like pornography, gambling, drinking and start to build a secret world that they refuse to let their spouse be part of.
They become distant.
Communication becomes only about those things necessary to get through the day.
Young adults get involved in activities they shouldn't be involved in and shut out their parents from their life.
Communication is minimal.
Maybe it is time to sit down with your spouse, your parents, your friends and get things out in the open.
Tell them how you feel.
I am a firm believer that many things can be worked out with honest and open communication. It does not make sense to go around miserable, holding inside the way you feel. Sit down and talk to those you love and begin to work out whatever problems there may be in your relationship.
Blending two or more lives together is always difficult because we are each so uniquely created. Without communicating it is impossible. Things will not change by magic, they won't all of a sudden be OK. As a matter of fact, they will only get worse until you sit down with that person you love, and talk through whatever the problems may be.
We don't talk more because we are afraid of what the outcome may be.
We live in pain, we live knowing things aren't the way they should be because of the unknown consequences if we sit down and openly talk about our feelings.
Listen, pray, and ask God to go before you.
Let your faith be real as you trust God with the outcome.
Make plans to sit down and have that "difficult conversation" with the person in your life you need to resolve some issues with.
There is no day like today.
God will strengthen you and be there with you.
